Kissing Toads

I have heard it said that, “Before you meet your handsome prince, you have to kiss a lot of toads!”  This was definitely true for me except I didn’t kiss them all!  At one time, I made a list with a running total of all the guys I dated–there were about 75.  But my list stopped immediately when I met number 76 – Steve Wassom.

I had dated a wide variety of young men.  The scariest was a Vietnam vet that I was assigned to go with to a church computer dance at BYU.  No one else would go with him so I volunteered to help him out.  At the time, I didn’t know he had post-traumatic stress syndrome.  I later learned that he would wake up violently and threaten his roommates.  I barely tolerated the date.  While we were dancing, he told me that he could tell that I was a really good girl because he could sense how much I wanted him and that I was holding back.  Oh, no!  It took me a bit to convince him that I wasn’t going out with him again and that I wasn’t interested.

I will tell you about two who wanted to marry me.  Loren had had a crush on me since high school.  We had maybe only gone out once.  I had never been interested in him and had completely lost contact with him after I left Ririe High School. After his mission, he found out where I was living at Ricks College and showed up on the doorstep of my apartment.  I was surprised by his visit and even more surprised when he pulled his patriarchal blessing out of his pocket and read me the paragraph about his wife.  It said that he would marry the woman of his choice.  He looked up expectantly implying that it was talking about me.  I gently let him know that it wasn’t me and that I was sure he would find someone who would love him back.

The other was named Harold.  He had been on a mission to Japan.  He was in my branch at BYU.  He was an excellent musician that played guitar with the BYU jazz band, Synthesis.  He was very nice and we had fun talking about music.  We went out a few times and I could tell he was getting serious.  But as I got to know him better it was very apparent that we were very different people, and that it wouldn’t work for me.

I was worried sick about how to tell him.  I hate hurting people!  My roommates and people at work watched me agonizing over it and told me that I had to tell him how I really felt.  My crazy boss, Dr. Flammer, a Military History professor even told me that he would give me a medal if I did.

I decided I had to tell Harold that I couldn’t see him anymore.  He was from a very wealthy family from California and I was an Idaho farmer.  I tried to tell him how different we were and that it would never work.  He simply responded that he would buy me a farm.  I finally had to let him know that I didn’t have the kind of feelings for him that he deserved and that it was over.  He cried and said that he had wanted to marry me.  I hated hurting him and I cried, too.

For a long time, Harold would cry every time he saw me, and I would cry right back.

Dr. Flammer presented me with a military medal and it only made me feel worse.  Little did I know that my crazy boss would play a major role in my catching and landing number 76!